IT CONQUERED THE WORLD

American-International, 1956, Director: Roger Corman

Won't someone release this film on DVD already!?!?!?!

THE SHE CREATURE

American-International, 1956, Director: Edward L. Cahn

The Paul Blaisdell creation, known as Cuddles according to Bob Burns, is the materialization of a prehistoric female that comes from the sea to kill the enemies of the carnie hypnotist Dr. Carlo Lombardi. The egomaniacal doctor uses deep hypnosis to transmigrate the soul of his assistant Andrea into her first life body, millions of years prior to her present self. His experiments with the controlled Andrea are to prove re-incarnation and gain recognition, but his plans are foiled by the balanced and open-minded Dr. Ted Erickson who falls in love with the lovely assistant.

I’ve watched this one several times and enjoy it more with each viewing. Check out the book It Came from Bob’s Basement: Exploring the Science Fiction and Monster Movie Archive of Bob Burns for anecdotes about the creation of the monster. Lions Gate released the film on DVD as a double feature with Day the World Ended (1955) a few years back, so check it out.

THE HIDEOUS SUN DEMON

Pacific-International, 1959, Director: Robert Clarke

This is another monster whose image I’d been familiar with through my collection of horror books and magazines long before seeing the film. Dr. Gilbert McKenna, played by the director, is a hard drinking, lady killing, atomic research scientist who gets exposed to radioactive material, which causes him to become a scaly lizard mutant whenever he’s out in the sun, thus making him a creature of the light rather than the night. This transformation has something to do with the sun’s gamma-rays bringing about a state of backwards evolution (not sure how that works), ultimately causing poor Dr. McKenna to lose his mind and go on a killing spree. The movie is silly, at times violent, and a lot of fun, ending with the usual fate of the 1950's radiation induced monster. But I sure couldn't help feeling sorry for the poor guy. This film was later redubbed, with new footage added, and re-titled What’s up, Hideous Sun Demon (1983), as if it weren’t silly enough the way it was. Check out Image Entertainment's DVD releases of both titles.

INVASION OF THE SAUCER-MEN

Aka Invasion of the Hell Creatures, American-International, 1957, Director: Edward L. Cahn

When I was a boy, I had this little orange rubber figure of the film’s titular creature. At the time, I had no idea my monster toy had anything to do with a movie by which I’d eventually become intrigued, and I’m sure either my mother sold it at a garage sale, or it’s lost in a closet somewhere; but I remember my little creature having big eyes protruding out of a huge veined head. This character had come with a set of other plastic monsters, one of which I now remember as the giant reptilian Ymir from the sci-fi classic 20 Million Miles to Earth (1957).

A few years ago, I discovered a book called Sleaze Creatures: An Illustrated Guide to Obscure Hollywood Horror Movies 1956-1959 written by D. Earl Worth. The book features black and white photos with a written plot of each film featured within its pages. One of the films featured is Invasion of the Saucer-Men. I’ve never seen this movie, but I am now familiar with the story, have watched the trailer via YouTube, and have finally gotten a good look at these little green (brown?) men. I’ve also heard there is a legitimate DVD release on its way, so I’m crossing my fingers and keeping a look out. If anyone out there happens to have a VHS copy or bootleg on DVD, please feel free to send to me an early Halloween gift.

UPDATE: 7/23/2012

I was at my parents' house today, searching through some of the old toys my mom had kept from my childhood, and look what I came across:

Come to find out, these little guys actually belonged to my brother.  My mother showed to me a photo of us two celebrating our birthdays.  These guys were on top of his cake; mine had Star Wars figures.  Eight creatures were rescued from attic obscurity today.  Still missing an orange fish creature though.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2010

So I finally got a chance to see the new A Nightmare on Elm Street last night and I was very impressed. Of course I had no expectations due to some lousy reviews I read online, but I don’t think my preconceived notions had much to do with the enjoyment I got out of this film. I was a little bored during the first twenty minutes or so, and a few of the script’s one-liners along with some of the effects had my eyes rolling, but by the time the end credits rolled I found myself loving the film. First of all, one could easily feel a sense of desperation throughout the movie. The young actors had me convinced they hadn’t slept for days but were too afraid to close their eyes. I was especially impressed with the heaviness the two leads conveyed. Secondly, Freddy looked great! I heard that some silly critics were disappointed because the new make-up rendered Freddy expressionless, but that’s nonsense. This new Freddy is evil, and this evil wasn’t just evident in his actions, but in his facial expressions as well. The Freddy Krueger played by Robert Englund became such a cultural icon that he stopped being scary. He became funny, and audiences began to root for him. In the theater I was in, by the time the movie’s heroes defeated Freddy at the end, people were cheering. The new Freddy was definitely not liked by the crowd, mainly because this new version of the story really emphasized that Freddy was a pedophile. Jackie Earle Haley’s performance and suggestive dialogue about molesting his victims when they were children made the viewer feel uncomfortable. This new Freddy isn’t a joke. He’s not a cartoon character and he won’t be the antihero he was in the 80s. It’s easy to tell that I obviously enjoyed this remake. The film offered new twists, good performances, mostly impressive eye candy, and a Freddy that will actually give the audience nightmares.

A Nightmare on Elm Street

As of this writing, I still haven’t seen the new A Nightmare on Elm Street, but I plan to take my wife to the theater tonight if we can find someone to watch Ransom. I don’t really have any expectations for the film, so I probably won’t be disappointed, though a lot of the people I’ve talked to about it don’t seem thrilled over the reworking of their childhood hero. Even though I’d rather see new ideas, I don’t mind all the remakes, and it doesn’t bother me that Hollywood has made it its mission to upgrade all the horror icons of the last three decades. So far, I’ve enjoyed most of them with few exceptions. In fact, some have proven to be better than the originals. Besides, studios have been doing it since the beginning of cinema. Freddy, Jason, Michael, and Leatherface are all horror icons. They’re the Dracula, Frankenstein, Wolf Man, and Mummy of the 80s. I wonder if fans protested so much when Hammer Studios did their take on those Universal monsters in the late 50s through the early 70s. Any horror icon’s story that has been made into a successful franchise is eventually going to be retold as technology evolves and new generations become interested. It’s not a big deal, and I’m tired of hearing horror nerds cry about it. Get over it already.

Anyway, I’ve just finished watching the original A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) along with all its sequels in order to freshen up on what used to be the primary topic of conversation during school lunch and recess. I own the Freddy box set that was released several years back and have watched these films many times, but this was a special viewing. Over the last week while watching these movies I’ve been taking a stroll down memory lane and reminiscing about my initial childhood viewings of these influential celluloid nightmares. Watching Freddy movies always brings me back to my years as a dorky little nerd with glasses and a buzz cut, and I still remember how frightening it was to see those knives for the first time.

I was about seven years old when I was first subjected to the terror that is Fred Krueger. I don’t think my mother realized the content of the film when she let my grandmother record it on a VHS tape for us kids. My memory is a little hazy, but I remember that I was in the house on a sunny day waiting for my mother to return from wherever she was. My father was at work, and I have no clue where my brother and sister could’ve been. I’m also not sure if she had let me watch it as to keep me busy until she returned, or if I had decided on my own accord without her knowing. Whichever the case, the movie had only been playing for about twenty minutes when I grabbed our English bulldog and ran for the back door. After witnessing him build his infamous glove, get his face ripped off, and slice up his first victim, I knew Freddy was in my house and I wasn’t about to let him get me and my dog. So I waited outside where the sun was shining. When my mother arrived and found me sitting in the driveway with my arms around my dog, scared shitless, she made the decision to permanently ban Freddy from our household. One would think I would have acceded to her ruling, but still I found ways of letting the master of nightmares into my mind.

Though Freddy scared me shitless as a kid, it never deterred my interest in the movies and merchandise. My mother made sure I wasn’t able to watch Freddy films at the house, but I always kept up with the story line via my school buddies whose parents allowed them to make Freddy a father figure. I also found ways to see a couple of the sequels by going to sleepovers with friends. I remember getting to watch A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: the Dream Master (1988) at my cousin’s home. I had spent the weekend with him, and he was allowed to watch things that I could only read about. When A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: the Dream Child (1989) was released in theaters my mother allowed me to buy the book adaptation. I also recall having her approval to stay up on Friday nights to watch the Freddy’s Nightmares (1988-1990) TV show, subsequently making the couch my bed. So I guess my mom loosened up a bit as I got older and Freddy became a national hero of sort. Today, watching Freddy on the screen elicits laughter rather than scares (a lot of it intentional), but I’m hoping this new remake will bring me back to a time when I was too frightened to finish a movie.

Wretched. Filthy. Ugly.

I used to be in a punk band called Calibretto 13. At that time I was a Christian, and as a result, most of my lyrics were based on my religious convictions. As the band toured and I got older, I began to outgrow Christianity and regain interest in my first love: horror films. I began to write more lyrics based on horrific situations, death, and murderers, which ultimately caused Calibretto 13 to get kicked off our record label. The band dropped the 13 and joined a new label only to break up shortly afterward. While Calibretto was still playing shows, I was brainstorming about a horror based project I wanted to pursue called Harley Poe. After Calibretto disbanded, it’s members helped me record the first Harley Poe album. After that, we went our separate ways and Harley Poe found new members. The roster for Harley Poe hasn’t changed for some time and our new album and fourth release Wretched. Filthy. Ugly. will be available in a couple days from Chain Smoking Records. I’ve decided to give some explanations for my lyrics from the new album. Feel free to comment or ask questions.


1. “Gordon” was initially a poem I had written and illustrated for a book that never got published, so I thought it would make a fun song. I used a familiar melody that has been used numerous times for hymns, but it might be hard to tell since we speeded it up and added a bunch of stops to make it punk rock.
2. I discovered the Tiger Lillies through Rue Morgue magazine a few years ago and have since acquired several of their albums. I love their song “Terrible.” It’s so offensive and fucked up; Harley Poe just had to cover it. I decided to put it on the album because it felt so natural for us to play. Of course, we don’t do it as well as the Tiger Lillies, but I think we’ve made it our own.
3. “Kokomo” is simply a song about the giant landfill I call home. There really is nothing to do around this factory town except get high and bitch about all the religious trash, low-lives, and bigots who make up the majority, unless you’re into cruisin’ around the mall with your stereo blasted like an asshole. This is the place where those with potential flee at the moment an opportunity presents itself. I’ve never known anyone to come back to this shit-hole after they’ve escaped, and most of my scumbag friends have moved away. So why am I still here? I guess it’s because it really doesn’t matter where I live; people are everywhere. No matter what city I live in, I’m surrounded by them, and as much as people need people, I’d sure like to burn up most of them.
4. To people who don’t really know me, I might come off as pessimistic or bitter, but in my mind I’m a very positive, happy person. I love my wife and kids, and I’m grateful for the life I’ve been given. I’m such a happy person that the possibility of this world ending sounds likes a beautiful idea. I think the problem with me is that since I view life with such a positive outlook and innocence, I have no tolerance for abusers, religious bigots, chauvinists, irresponsible parents, and stupid, rude, inconsiderate, greedy, and mean people in general. Maybe I’m a prig, or maybe I just expect too much from the human race. Either way, come the Zombie Apocalypse, I’ll take it as a sign that God also has lost tolerance for those people and is ready to start over again. I welcome that day with open arms. After all, it’s only the end of the world.
5. “Suckers” is about a schmuck who has no respect for women and gets what he deserves when he runs into a girl a little too eager to get her mouth around the blue vein. Listen to the lyrics.
6. “That Time of the Month” is about my wife. Every time she’s on her period she turns into a werewolf.
7. If you couldn’t tell, “Everybody Knows My Name” is a declaration from Death. After the chorus, it’s no longer Death speaking but one of Death’s victims crying out to God.
8. I like surf music. I arranged a surf song with the boys. The sound clips come from old horror films.
9. “Maria” is my remake of The Exorcist in lyrical form. One day I’ll direct it.
10. “Stick It in the Man” is an autobiographical song about reaching my dreams and telling the skeptics and those who would get in my way to fuck off. It’s about feeling good about what you’re doing and taking what you want, and in my case, being in God’s will. Many people think because I’m not a Christian anymore that I’m no longer in touch with God, but I think those people are silly.